STRIKE THIS OFF THE TO-DO LIST

A cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind.

A sentence that you will find in any organizing book ever written. It may even be the sign of a creative mind. Artists are usually depicted as messy, wild and unruly. All I know is a cluttered desk means I will be doing the bare minimum as my brain can’t process anything amidst the distractions. Quite sad, isn’t it, that we as a species need clean, pastel-colored spaces with soothing candles and perpendicularly arranged objects to get our minds to function. We used to hunt; you know? I’m sure prehistoric jungles had no calendar planners.

I am sadly one of those who contribute to the growth of the organization tool industry. Planners, whiteboards, vision boards, to-do lists, color coded binders, highlighters, the unmissable Notion – you name it, I have it and have used it too. Yes, it gives some unexplainable sense of satisfaction, like an itch you didn’t know you had, being scratched, when you do everything systematically. Even sitting and writing a to-do list gives a sense of accomplishment. What say, even making your bed flips a switch in your head to make you feel good about yourself. Isn’t it all sounding like a scam? As if we created a system where a mess is considered wrong and a systematic arrangement is considered right, and we are all hardwired in our school days to feel that way?

If I tell my grandma that my to-do list includes things like “make bed” and “wash hair” she just might smack me. She doesn’t need tools; she has a mental alarm that wakes her up by 5AM. She has responsibilities that run like clockwork, and it is a sense of discipline that was imbibed without choice. For decades, if she didn’t go about her day as she does, there are workers who wouldn’t be fed, cows that wouldn’t be milked, children who wouldn’t reach school and on and on. In fact, if you look at any of our mothers and grandmothers who take the brunt of being homemakers and caregivers, the 5AM grind isn’t a choice. There is an entire family eco-system dependent on their time and financial management skills. To top that, we expect to be pampered by them for going to an air-conditioned office and sitting at a desk all day. Fortunately for us, they are sweet enough to do that too.

I don’t know if paying them for their hard work would make it right, I don’t think we can ever add a monetary value to selflessness. Further, these benefit transfers are likely to be not used by the woman at all (like the women sarpanchs whose husbands run the show) and that just defeats the purpose. I definitely do know that homemakers and caregivers deserve all the respect in the world. No woman, or man, should feel the slightest hint of shame when filling their occupation as “homemaker” in a form. There is also this tendency to shift housework to the woman in double income families, using the feeble “she does it better anyway” excuse. I wonder where all the claims of physical superiority go when it comes to some mopping and sweeping.

But yes, clean, well-maintained homes, workspaces and dorm rooms always help. Maybe it’s not the actual cleanliness but the sense of independence, of being able to solve one problem of your surroundings, that drives the serotonin. After all, its homes and offices that make a country and its people. “Ghar accha karo, Gaanv accha ho jaayega” -says my mom in many layered meanings, and in Konkani, not Hindi. If you pay close attention to what your moms say na, you realize that microeconomics and macroeconomics is just being translated to local languages and references.

However, to her disappointment, I can’t bring myself to be disciplined how hard I try. No matter how much money I waste on bullet journals, how much time I waste on YouTube motivation videos – it is always easier to hide under the blanket of my unmade bed and worry about the dirty pan in which I made Maggi x days ago than actually get up and wash it. No, don’t worry – I can confirm its just laziness. Maybe discipline will kick in when I have to take care of people who are not myself, but at the moment I am definitely enjoying my “not answerable to anyone’ messy, lazy life. Have you seen Taare Zameen Par? The scene where Ishaan tries to wake up – that is my entire childhood, minus the artistic talent. I wonder where that went.